Get Real

Get Real
Originally uploaded by lorenzodom

Get Real

Sometimes I feel like a third set of teeth
that never came in.

As if, I never existed, as if
artifice is the only means of getting noticed
or accepted or approved—
pretending all the time.

Simply being human is not divine,
and a futile exercise otherwise.
Because then, than I get noticed for the wrong reasons:
then I’m for real, and much like everyone else.

Then, I might be a set of crooked, off-white teeth.

*

A Serenity Prayer for the Stressed

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they pissed me off.

And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today, as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.

Help me to always give 100% at work: 12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday, 5% on Fridays.

Finally, help me to remember, when I'm having a really bad day and it seems that people are trying to piss me off, that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me.

Amen

— anonymous —